Success is not built upon itself, but upon the back of failure and suffering. Failure is bred from a lack of understanding. In it's purest form, this lack of knowledge and experience is hacked through brute force, until a suitable solution to a single puzzle is found, though not through understanding. Through attempt after attempt, try after try, until either a random chance occurrence or simple lack of possibilities brings about a desired result. “Eureka!” I've arrived at my intended destination! The very question I asked, now contains a reasonable point of conclusion. Does it not sway you then to it's narrowly defined ways? Why then do people still feel empty inside? Why is their lack of understanding the very breeding ground for what I accept as a “purpose” in my life? The directions I move are naught but those which seem absent in those around me. Gently pushing while violently falling into orbit around that which I literally feel missing in the world. Will it tear me apart? No. It will not. Not because of my strength of character, and not because of the sheer choice of my will, but because when I stop those around me from being torn apart, I no longer reflect that pain. I no longer am in agony with that suffering, because it no longer is prevalent where before it was overwhelming. Where still does this leave me? I am only full because I sate the hunger around me. I am only me, because those around me need direction...and it appears that my direction is never my own, but theirs. Inevitably, this leads me to wonder why...and I guess to arrive at the answer, I must first find someone with the same question as I.
(don't forget i've actually moved my journal over to my website at http://www.thewanderinggod.com as well as added a few other frills, such as my videos of parkour and some of my martial arts training.)