November 22nd, 2008

caricature

slacking...

So in the inclusion of all this stuff that I have committed to doing...I needed to get something to handle my schedule. In order to handle the schedule, i had an alarm set for myself that would go off every morning letting me know what is going on that day.

I lost that phone. No more alarm. No more schedule. Two weeks later, i've missed a ton of appointments. Nothing that won't be so difficult to get back into the flow of things with...but still. It's brought up an important issue. Slacking.

I become more reliant on other things...other pieces of equipment to keep track of my life. Why I don't just do this myself is beyond me at this point. My mind is more than capable of handling everything that this technology is doing for me. I started relying on an alarm...and now it seems that my internal clock is not being used. That will change. I started relying on a schedule...(albeit i'm going to start keeping it again...but online)...and now i'm left with a hole in my life...where I used to be, that got replaced by some technology...that is now lost. It seems that it took my mind with it.

*shrugs*

just another reminder to rely on myself...(though that only works when I don't loose things)

guess all i can do at this point is step up the effort i put into life. Just because I'm happy, doesn't mean i shouldn't put effort into keeping it that way.

i'm usually better than this. I should continue to do so.